When I bought the boat ladder, I knew it would not work but whether or not it worked was more or less irrelevant. The fun was trying to make it work, ergo messing around with boats.

There’s a lady who’s sure all that glitters is gold
And she’s buying a stairway to heaven.

The first thing I had to do was to move the er stanchion things from the bottom to the top of the ladder so they could get purchase on the small back of my boat. This necessitates new collars as the originals have a key thing that fits into a groove on the aluminum  vertical tube. This means they do not fit higher up where there is no groove.This groove is to be important.  After a lot of mime fun at my favorite hardware store, the owner, who is now an enthusiastic partner in my various crimes, comes up with a bathroom fitting which will do nicely.

There’s a sign on the wall but she wants to be sure
‘Cause you know sometimes words have two meanings.
Well, well

I position the stairway to heaven on the boat whereupon it becomes clear that the horseshoe like brackets that go over the stern are far too wide.  No problem as I lash a big lump of wood to the horseshoes thus obtaining a snug fit.

Ooh, it makes me wonder,
Ooh, it really makes me wonder.

As I clamber up the ladder, the stanchions splay sideways under the pressure. There is no groove nor key to keep them facing forward.  Hmmm, that’s about it.

Time to BBQ a big fish on the Cobb

She’s the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.